INTERNET DATING AT ITS BEST/WORST
Once you get on Internet dating sites you have, in essence, joined a new community. And like the dynamics of real communities, there are some that come into play here, too, in your virtual community.
One of the more interesting things I noticed about community was the fact that I was getting to know some people rather well though I never met them and probably never well.
While that statement makes no sense, let me explain. All of the iDating sites send you photos of many people who they think will “click” with you based on your profile and that of the person they pick.
What happens after a few months is that you notice you keep getting the same photos of the same people week after week. While you are looking for someone new who you find appealing, you see the same old faces. Pretty soon, you say, “Oh, there’s lovinlife49 again. I guess she still hasn’t found “Mr. Right,” or they would have stopped sending me her photos.
If the person is appealing, you may click on the link and read their profile and usually get to see more photos of this person. Pretty soon you get to know who changes their photos, updates their profile and puts on clean underwear. Okay, the last one was just to add levity to this odd subject.
If you are astute, you may even be able to tell something about the psyche of this person. You can notice insecurities, timidity, frustration and anger if you look closely at the things they say on an ongoing basis. All of this observation over time may even help you to pick the right person to date.
Do keep in mind that this is a process and takes some months before you can figure it all out. By the time you do, it may be too late. You may find out your potential new love interest has already found someone and will never get to know you.
You can even become friends with others on these dating sites if you so choose. I know a woman who used to contact other women telling them she was looking for single women in her neighborhood to become friends with so as to socialize and go places. This is a great idea for any men or women who want to meet new people with whom they can go and do things.
Just like in any community, you should follow certain dictates of etiquette. You should remain civil and nice to all you come in contact with, or rumors can spread in the single community. You don’t want to be known as the lecher from Maple Avenue or the slut from North Glendale. When you make contact with others, be respectful and courteous.